{"id":3161,"date":"2019-03-11T05:20:52","date_gmt":"2019-03-11T13:20:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/babysparks.com\/?p=3161"},"modified":"2020-10-16T08:57:45","modified_gmt":"2020-10-16T16:57:45","slug":"solitary-parallel-play-why-babies-toddlers-play-alone-together","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/babysparks.com\/2019\/03\/11\/solitary-parallel-play-why-babies-toddlers-play-alone-together\/","title":{"rendered":"Solitary &#038; Parallel Play: Why Babies &#038; Toddlers Play Alone Together"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-3160 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/administrator.babysparks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/20167a-300x199.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" srcset=\"https:\/\/babysparks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/20167a-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/babysparks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/20167a-768x510.jpg 768w, https:\/\/babysparks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/20167a.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/>You organize a playdate for your baby, and he sits in a corner playing by himself. Or you observe toddlers at a daycare who are happily playing alongside each other, but not <em>with<\/em> each other.<\/p>\n<p>What\u2019s going on? Aren\u2019t little ones supposed to be learning to socialize?<\/p>\n<p>Yes, but at this age they don\u2019t learn social skills from peers. They learn them from you. Babies and toddlers love playing with people in their \u201cinner circle\u201d (like parents, caregivers, or immediate family). But put them in a room with a same-aged peer, and they likely prefer to play alone. They do their own thing simply because they haven\u2019t developed the social and emotional skills to interact with other little ones. Their play skills evolve in stages, bringing them closer and closer to cooperative play.<\/p>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td><b><i>Highlights:\u00a0<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Babies and toddlers learn social skills from their \u201cinner circle,&#8221; including parents, caregivers, and immediate family.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They haven\u2019t developed the social or emotional skills to interact with same-age peers yet.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are the stages of play for babies and toddlers:\u00a0<\/span>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">0-3 Months: <\/span><b>Unoccupied Play<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> &#8211; Newborns are learning about their bodies and forming connections for learning how to play.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Before age 2: <\/span><b>Solitary and Onlooker Play<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> &#8211; Babies observe other children, but prefer to play alone.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Around Age 2: <\/span><b>Parallel Play<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> &#8211; Toddlers play alongside other children, but not with them.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Since parents are a child&#8217;s primary source for social interaction throughout these stages, parent-child playtime is essential to optimal development.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<h2>Stages of Play for Babies and Toddlers<\/h2>\n<p>In the 1920s, researcher Mildred Parten identified stages of play from birth through late childhood. These stages are still widely used as milestones for play. We\u2019ll take at look at the baby and toddler stages, but remember that all children are different. It\u2019s common for little ones to follow this timeline, but some are naturally more social with other children, especially if they know them well.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Birth to 3 Months \u2014 \u201cUnoccupied Play\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You may not think of babies this age playing. It looks more like random waving of the arms and legs. But all that wiggling teaches babies about their bodies and surroundings, and forms important connections for learning how to grasp and manipulate objects during play.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Before Age 2 \u2014 \u201cSolitary &amp; Onlooker Play\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When little ones share play space before age 2, it\u2019s developmentally appropriate for them to not interact. As they near their second birthday, they become more aware of other children (sometimes watching or commenting on what they\u2019re doing) but still prefer to play alone.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Around Age 2 \u2014 \u201cParallel Play\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Around their second birthday, toddlers progress to playing alongside other children but not actually playing with them. They may sit beside each other playing with toy cars, occasionally observing each other or talking, but not playing a cooperative game like a car race.<\/p>\n<p>Just because little ones don\u2019t want to play together doesn\u2019t mean they don\u2019t want each other\u2019s toys. Head over<strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/babysparks.com\/2019\/03\/07\/what-to-do-when-your-toddler-wont-share\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">here<\/a> <\/strong>for tips about settling sharing squabbles.<\/p>\n<h2>What These Stages Mean for You<\/h2>\n<p>Even though your baby or toddler may not be interested in playing with other children, he loves to play with you. Whether it\u2019s <a href=\"https:\/\/babysparks.com\/2018\/03\/23\/structured-vs-unstructured-play-whats-the-difference-why-does-it-matter\/\"><strong>structured or unstructured play<\/strong><\/a>, playtime with parents and caregivers is essential to optimal development. Playing alone also has its benefits. Around his first birthday he starts feeling comfortable playing alone (even if just for a few minutes).<\/p>\n<p>When you\u2019re with other children your child\u2019s age, you can start to familiarize him with the idea of cooperative play by facilitating group games (see our BabySparks activities \u201cGive &amp; Receive III\u201d and \u201cTeam Bubbles\u201d for inspiration). The key is that you remain involved to model and guide interaction during play.<\/p>\n<p>As his social, emotional and play skills develop, your child will gradually become more interested in playing with other children. By age 4, most children engage in cooperative play.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You organize a playdate for your baby, and he sits in a corner playing by himself. Or you observe toddlers at a daycare who are happily playing alongside each other,<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3160,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[101,1687,2013,2014,3278],"age":[66,67,68,69,70,71],"class_list":["post-3161","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-social-emotional","tag-play","tag-toddler","tag-solitary-play","tag-parallel-play","tag-baby-2","age-7-9-months","age-10-12-months","age-13-15-months","age-16-18-months","age-19-21-months","age-22-24-months"],"translation":{"provider":"WPGlobus","version":"2.12.2","language":"en","enabled_languages":["en","es"],"languages":{"en":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"es":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false}}},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with 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